Tuesday, August 19, 2014

My year of Radical Change

This is a very personal post for me. Some of the things I've shared before some of the things I really haven't shared before. But, this week especially I have had a lot of things going through my mind. I feel like I've had many changes going on in my personal life. I won't go into all of them here. But, it made me realize how I am tired of constantly living in fear and anxiety. I want to be able to go out and live a normal life. I like who I am minus the anxiety part of me and my other health issues. Those are two things I am constantly battling. I feel like anytime something good happens to me I end up pushing it away out of fear and I don't want to do that anymore.

Today I realized that if I could I would radically change my life. I obviously can't do something super drastic like take a trip across the world or hike a mountain. But, someday in the future I would like to be able to do something like that. Of Course in order to get that far I need to make some changes in my life right now. Today, it got me thinking and racking my brain. So, I came up with my Happiness Journey.

 1. My Physical Journey

 Okay, so in Eat, Pray, Love Elizabeth Gilbert ran off to Italy. For me that is so not going to happen. Cheryl Strayed hiked a mountain. Again, so not going to happen. But, I thought of somethings I could do.

*Get my health issues in order. Some you may or might not know I have gallbladder issues. I do stuff on a daily basis for this. Mostly, I try to eat gluten-free 90% of the time and try to not eat very fatty foods. It helps but I do occasionally get flare ups and attacks. I see nutritionist who has me on herbal supplements. This does seem to work. I would like to eventually maybe see a doctor and not just have them give me morphine and send me on my way.

*Lose weight. I think I might do the 21 day fix. I have heard a lot of good things about it and think this could be a good option for me. *schedule my meals for the week. I read a lot of fitness blogs and they are really inspiring me to make this change. I think you know who you are and thank you for being a positive inspiration for me.

*Pack boxes everyday. Some you might know or maybe not that we need to move. Now, we plan on being out of the house by October. It has been very stressful trying to get things packed up and trying to find a place to live. I hope we find a place to go soon and can get everything packed up in time. I am including this in my physical journey since it is a physical part of my life and what I need to focus on for the next month.

2. My Emotional Journey 

*my main goal is to lessen my anxiety and stress. I've sort of been living like a hermit these last few years. And that is going to change. I want to be able to go out more. And not just force myself to go out but actually enjoy going out. A part of what causes my anxiety is worrying about if I am going to have a panic attack. Anyone that deals with anxiety knows this can be very scary and daunting. But, I don't want it to hinder me.

3. My Spiritual Journey 

*my Yoga Practice. I practice Kundalini yoga and it really helps me. To relieve stress and my anxiety and is just good for me in many ways. *My spiritual/prayer life. I wont really go into that here but it is something I need to get back to.

4. My Work Journey 

*Blogging/Vlogging. Blogging has become a huge part of my life. It truly is more then just a hobby for me. I've met so many amazing women and want to continue with my blogging journey. I also plan on starting a vlog once I move and things are settled down a bit. *Writing my book. I started writing a book awhile back ago. I actually started writing it almost 4 years ago. It is hard for me to imagine. It is something I really feel the need to finish. It has been on my heart to do so for while now.

5. Rest/Fun Journey

 Something I've also learned these past few years is that you need to avoid burnout. Like Elizabeth Gilbert talks about in her journey in Bali that it is all about balance. Too much and too little of anything is not good for our hearts and souls. Sometimes we need to make time for ourselves. We need to make time for our own personal journey. But, it dawned on me that this journey also includes rest and fun. I don't want to get so caught up in the process that I lose sight of myself or the people I care about. Apart of my resting/fun journey  is making time to do the things I love and enjoy. Not taking anything too seriously where it becomes a chore and no longer fun. And hopefully spending time with people that I like and having some fun in the process.

I hope my goals and Happiness Journey did not bore you too much. It has been on my heart and mind to write this for awhile now and I thought it was finally time to share a bit more of my story and my journey. A lot of this stuff I know will take a while to completely put into practice and get through. But, I am excited for my goals and to maybe being able to truly live my life on my own terms. If you stuck through reading this whole post I really appreciate it.

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  1. I am super excited that you are making strides toward achieving goals that you have. Fitness and weight loss are some things that I see continuously, everywhere. But anxiety not so much. Anxiety is real and it sucks real bad! I deal with anxiety and it is kinda weird for me because I just developed it a couple years ago. I thought I was having a stroke one day because of the severity but then I realized it was not a stroke at all!

    I have used unconventional ways to overcome anxiety, namingly meditation and practicing shifting mindset. Again, that is weird too because mindset came natural to me before. In the meantime, I have a blog I wrote a while ago about how I overcame anxiety and you are welcome to it if you like.

  2. Yay you for making these goals. I wish you the best in all of them. Im sure you will rock it :)

  3. One step at a time. I am so happy to see that you are extensively thinking about what you want to do and you are making plans to accomplish them. One day at a time... that is what you need to tell yourself because if you get overwhelmed, it may trigger some anxiety. You can do this. I hope you document your journey so we can follow along.

  4. Your plan sounds awesome! You can do it! I did a Whole30 once and it was AMAZING. The results were definitely just as emotional as they were physical.


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